2g1c hearts KTP in TO

Katy, listen, I know we’re sitting in the nose bleeds, cheap seats, but I am pretty sure that you can still hear us screaming. Oh no, wait, I can’t even hear us scream.  Our seats are off to the left of the stage, but perfect for two chicas who may have had a big beer (20 oz) or two, or 4….but who’s counting other than the oddly restrictive bartender in the 300 section, sheesh lady, it’s supposed to be fun, and how can you expect me to keep singing if I don’t hydrate? That’s science and you can’t argue with that.  Oh yeah, perfect seats for us; they are perfect for the following reasons: (notice the semi-colon and colon both used incorrectly, brutal mm, just brutal) 

Reason

1.  A railing to prevent us from falling forward
2. A railing to prevent us from falling backward
3. An aisle- for our long grasshopper legs to stick out- as if we’d ever want to sit down!
4. No one sitting behind us, so no one yelling at these tall ladies to “Take a seat, you paid for it!”
So, these seats are perfect.  Wait, except for the 2 following reasons:
1. We can see the so-called FANs in the floor seats AREN’T dancing. I mean What is the point of having floor seats if your not going to at least try to touch Katy Perry? or impress her with your mad fanny shaking skills? Get to it FLOOR you’re making us look bad.
2. The morons further down the row who have TB, TB being Teeny Bladder, as made famous by Mrs. Brady, not Tuberculosis, which would be very contagious and you shouldn’t be at the ACC, it’s also kind of a retro illness wouldn’t you say? like Legionnaire’s disease, which I am not even sure really exists.
As you can tell by the random-oscity* of this blog entry, we had a lot of fun at KTP and she had a lot of fun in TO. I should hope so, if we’re the uber-caliber of people she didn’t meet, I can only imagine who she did meet, the big 3 being:  CBC radio 2, Rick Mercer & the oddly restrictive bartender in the 300 section at the ACC.  As an interesting side note, it turns out that none of those diseases are retro, they just don’t happen to middle class, 30somethings…. Glad this isn’t a medical blog, I bet you are too.

Scientifically,
mm

*Random-oscity meaning multiple random topics lacking common through line

2g1c hearts KTP in TO

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