Little Pants On Fire

Pants on fire

Nobody likes a know-it-all, especially kids.  Even if that know-it-all is a kid.  I am a know-it-all, always have been.  When I was a wee lass I would make up answers if I didn’t know them. Which really helped me in improv, but not so much at recess.  I have always had an answer, even without hearing the question. I would make up all sorts of things: Fake boyfriends, dance routines and secret identities- most of whom were way cooler than me. Though my lies were never hurtful to others it’s not a ladylike quality. Unless you’re a great liar, but I have never met a great child-liar. That would be such a strange waste of talent since their social circle is limited and great lies are a dish best shared. But being a know-it-all-child-liar…let’s just say I wasn’t very popular.

Going to school was tough for me. I wanted to chit-chat, play and ham it up. Recess wasn’t long enough to shake my sillies out. To then sit clustered in desks with 2 of the dreaded Jennifers and my grade school love, it was hard to focus on math- especially since it was in French. I never wanted to do anything that seemed like work. I preferred to spin, whistle, day dream and sing.  Imagine, my teacher trying to reign in this teeny tattle-tail blonde haired know-it-all dervish. She would beg for my attention with promise craft time, silent reading outside and soccer baseball. Then there was her constant suggestion that I take part in more extra-curricular activities…you know to make friends and wear me out. So, I tried line dancing, soccer, choir, broom ball…you name the intramural I did it. But being a know-it-all, I wouldn’t listen to instructions. Or pass the ball, or stop yelling for my turn, or hogging the mic. Even after playing all with all these teams, I was still happier lying to myself and others about the fancy things I could think up.

Recently, I have been reassessing my choice of career. (I wholeheartedly believe artist isn’t a choice) After taking a personality test geared to help me choose a career; I learned that I am happiest lying and bossing people around. Well, isn’t that just perfect!?! I am a professional liar. I lie that I know what’s going on.  That I am up to date on current events.  I lie that I am prepared to be the person I should be.  I lie that I am the right person for the job.  I lie that I am that character somebody else wrote. I lie that everything is a-okay.  But as a know-it-all, I know that’s how everybody feels.  I know this unpopular teeny tattle-tail blonde haired know-it-all has grown up to make friends.  I know that having a secret identity is a great way to prepare myself to perform for others.  I know that lies can help me feel better.  And I know that lying down is the best way to fall asleep. So, maybe knowing and lying aren’t so bad.  Now, if I could just find a few more people to boss around…

Little Pants On Fire

2 thoughts on “Little Pants On Fire

  1. Cathy says:

    Love this…Miss Meliss…you’re getting that “Inside” tap dance down pat…And that is no Lie my Dear… xo Cathy

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